I'm running low on original thought, so here are some links that are funnier than I am today

If they'd left Dawn off of this list, I would have broken up with the internet.

I'm just kidding internet, we're together forever. But don't get any ideas about sharing a best friend necklace with Kriston and me. He's not down for the three way shit, just a one on one.

I have no recollection of the cause, but I bookmarked this in my blog notes folder. Given my complete distaste for and disinterest in all things Paris, I feel like I just got Punk'd.

It's still sitting on my DVR, but the reviews from my mom and Mrs. DCeiver lead me to believe that Meerkat Manor is this summer's hotness.

Startlingly accurage and creepy. Minutes upon minutes of effort have been thrown into attempts at coming up with homegrown versions of these, but I'm shooting blanks.

JetBlue was, is, and forever will be, First Class.

Seriously? The controversy that's blazing its way across morning news shows is the teenage version of the dog whistle? BTW, I can totally hear it and am therefore reafirming my youthful classification. I'm young! Ya hear me? Young!

The DCeiver chronicles one of funniest series of conversation topics I've participated in in quite some time. Photographic evidence chronicles exactly how enthralling it really was.

Why do people continually believe celebrities who go on Howard Stern and attest to the size of their manhood? I'm not calling Fez and Screech liars or anything, but in the list of Most Commonly Lied About Topics, that's gotta be in the top 5, somewhere between "Your Wife's Weight," "Number of People You've Slept With" and "Whether or Not You Actually Agree with Your Boss on Any Given Topic." Sure, Screech's girlfriend was there to "verify," but I'm not really in the practice of trusting anyone who nationally broadcasts a discussion of their endowment.

Please join me in welcoming the wonderful Lauren Holcomb to the blogosphere. Now, Lauren, tell me the truth -- how big is your penis?

Strange confluence of recent friend discussion topics and media coverage: "Much has been made of Mitch's nervous habit of touching his nose, was that a natural personal idiosyncrasy or something you and Richard Linklater came up with?"