Sommer's post on DCist sums it up about perfectly. Our friend Brian was shot in a mugging-gone-wrong late Tuesday night. He's down a spleen, but expected to make a full recovery. We can only assume that this process will lead to the development of super powers. When we saw him yesterday, he was in great spirits and doing as well as we could possibly have hoped for. In typical form, he was making jokes left and right and giving us a hard time. As Dave noted, now that we know the prognosis is good, his funny friends have been doing things like assembling Chuck-Norris-like facts about Brian Beutler. My favorite, I think, came from Julian: "When Jesus goes for a walk on the beach, the footprints in the sand next to his are Brian Beutler's." There's a benefit concert to help relieve his medical expenses in the works, which I'll be beating you about the head with details about soon enough.
One way to help is to give some blood. All donations at Washington Hospital Center given in his name will result in deductions from his medical bills upon leaving the hospital. I tried to give blood yesterday, but apparently my recent trip to Costa Rica was in the DANGER ZONE!! So anyhow: Brian is doing very well, all things considered. And for a laugh, see Ezra's graph. In the mean time, ask yourself What Would Brian Beutler do, and go drink some whiskey at the Black Cat.