A Very Will Smith Weekend

I was going to go with "My Adventures In The Wild Wild West" as a title, but then I realized that would make it the fourth Will Smith instance related to this weekend, so, I bow down to the Fresh Prince and allow him to reign supreme over my travels as he sees fit. I will, begrudgingly, get jiggy with it.

My westward travels started off in much the same fashion as they ended up, with lots of delayed flights, turbulance, and extended travel times. But, I made it in one piece, luggage in hand. And, with my new enhanced powers of deduction when it comes to adopted vs. biological children. Thank God for small favors. Beth and I had some excellent pizza for dinner(the first of about 8 boxes of pizza in Beth's apartment that weekend), then got all blinged up for a night out at Dos Gringos ("A great place to day drink!"), and Next ("A great place to kiss a DJ!"). We got into full on Beth/Amanda mode on the ride over, reading every road sign, many of the backwards, or with exclamation points at the end. Carrie and "Melissa" thought we were insane, but that wasn't a far leap from what they already believed. Dos Gringos had a new set up since last we met; they redid the inside bar to look like someone's basement, complete with wood paneling, old couches, concert posters, and a lava lamp. They even had stairs going over the wood paneling so you could scope it out and make sure mom wasn't coming down to bust the party. I felt right at home. We also got the distinct pleasure of seeing what Steve With Glasses would look like "on Rock 'n Roll." At Next, we had quite a big old time. Many many mixed drinks into the evening, it was time to take on the dance floor. I had no idea what I was in for. There was a group of guys that were getting steadily more and more skillful with their dance moves. There were about 5 of them in this entourage, including "Van Wilder/Curtis" and JC/"Center Stage." We met the guys and danced with them some, but then, before our very eyes, it turned into a full on DANCE OFF! It was full on high-caliber, Justin vs. Britney quality dance off. Even Billy Zane would have approved. There was a jump rope, a Zack Morris cell phone, and to many choreographed moves to discuss. It was Awesome (O).

The antics continued as we got home. Beth and I wanted to watch a movie in bed, slumber party style. By the time Mom asked us to turn down the racket, The Princess Bride wouldn't work, Beth got angry at the tracking and broke the remote, and we got Forrest Gump up and running - I had PTFO.

Saturday.
The weather continued to be atypical for that desert state with more rain on Saturday. Don't worry though, we made the most of it. After pointing out some obvious jokes to Beth (Kerre Russel, Russeling), we had a really good lunch at Applebees, and we learned a valuable lesson - babies love me, and are very suspicious of Beth. Then it was off to see Hitch (with a small wipeout on the way in; the pavement in Arizona is NOT suited to saturate much moisture, so with all the rain + reefs, I was slip slidin away, and I've got the bruises on my knee to prove it). Hitch was great, far better than I was expecting it to be. Still not a big Eva Mendes fan, but it was really funny, well put together, better than average romantic comedy. I also had my first Chantico from Starbucks. Holy deliciousness batman! The 390 calories and 21 grams of fat are almost worth it.

After putting our (game) faces on, it was off to the high school Beth works at (GO PRIDE!) for the regional championship basketball game. Man, I'd forgotten how fun high school basketball games were. "We" taped up ankles beforehand, rocked out to some Jesse McCartney, and listened to cheerleaders with "injured" ankles talk about how mean the other team's fans were ("Last time, they were yelling stuff at us, it was really mean, like, how we were all fat, and like ugly, and how we suck at cheer. They're so mean."). From what I saw, Corona del Sol fans didn't have anything on Mountain Point. Beth's kids all blacked out (with their clothes, not the way we do now) for the game, except one kid, who dressed up as Willy Wonka to tease a player for Corona (who looked just like Willy Wonka). He of course got chanted at, as did the short black guy ("Gary Coleman!"), and the Jewish looking guy ("Schindler's List!") (note: I don't really approve of either of those, just chronicling it). There was a reaaaaaaaally bad ankle injury to one of Beth's player's, but she was back in time for the victory to hear the following chant:

MP fans: REGION CHAMPS!
Corona fans: SO ARE WE!
MP fans: You just lost!

After the game, it was time for yet another night out on the town. We made some hot dogs and mac 'n cheese for dinner, got ready, and headed into Tempe to meet LMNOP and Aaron at The Tavern, home of a darts machine, an unimpressive dance off, and the world's...most... not-so-bright bartender. She charged us $4 for Red Bull Vodkas (except for one time, and when Beth asked, her response was "Oh well, sometimes I help people out, and sometimes I forget...so I'll just charge you $4). But apparently all that talk meant nothing, cause at the end of the night she goes, "So, your tab should be like $33, right?" Yes, absolutely. A full night of drinking mixed drinks? Definitely. Wow. On the way home, I decided to give Beth's little brother Robbie a ring on the phone. My message included something about "the sillhouette of camelback mountain in the moonlight," information regarding Beth running a red late due to "impatience," and the declaration, "You're a Tommasone, and I'm not. But it's ok, I'm comfortable with that." I also insisted, before PTFO, that Beth bring me water, ibuprofin, and a multi vitamin. "Now." When she urged me to sit up and take it, I "needed a minute." Then, PTFO ensued. Goooooooooood night!

Breakfast at The Good Egg (this really awesome breakfast place right next to Beth's apartment complex) proved delicious as always. I got my usual, the Wildcat Scramble, and Beth - true to form and ever competitive - got the Sun Devil Scramble. In-state rivalries, they're kind of her thing. I lusted after coca cola, and went gaga over babies, and learned that Beth hates babies, and springtime, and coca cola. How am I friends with her? We had a big day of shopping in Tempe (Pirates Arrrr Cool!), and of course, day drinking. We went to Four Peaks, this little brewery in Tempe with Peach beer, and some CRUCIAL pita bread. Not to mention the Spinach Gilmore (But when were you born? I mean, every Felicia I've ever known has been a woman...). We never made it to the Oxygen, Electronics and Shooting Range strip mall, so my trip wasn't quite complete, but, I think we did alright :) We decided to top our evening off with another movie, and made the fatal decision to go see The Wedding Date. AWFUL. Seriously. So bad. Huge chunks of the story line were edited out, it was absolutely terrible. Do not watch this movie. We'd have been better off reminding ourselves of the power of the babe. What babe? The babe with the power. What power? The power of voo doo... Ok, I'll stop.

So, Monday morning! Time to head out of town! Or, futily attempt to and get stuck in AZ another day! Alriiiiiiiiiiiiight. Beth royally confused her mom with "Oh, I'm on my way to the airport to pick up Amanda." She actually thought Beth had lost her mind for a moment there. Luckily, it was the nicest day I'd had there yet, so aside from the extra vacation day from work I had to take, it wasn't so bad. Beth went to work, and I wandered around her fancy pants shopping center across from her place. We met up at Barnes & Noble then went to the fancy pants grociery store and saw the coolest thing ever - a wine chiller. Works 25 times faster than a refrigerator! HOT DAMN! Cool damn? Anyhow, it was awesome. As are wasabi peas. I love those things. Y.A.S.! Y.A.O.!

We cooked up a delicious meal of chicken picata, risoto, spinach, and green beans (and Kansas Valley, AZ wine), watched American Idol (featuring a wahoo), and 24 (NOBODY GOES IN THERE WITHOUT ME!). ("He reminds me...." "Of Sean from Alias? Yeah, me too.") (John Gilmore = Jack Bauer). We played Trivial Persuit 90s edition, which is really fun. We added lifelines - 1 call, 1 google, 1 IM, and one call to Robbie or Josh. I won, despite Beth getting TWO 1997 Men In Black questions in a row, and a question about Jerry Maguire.

It was FINALLY time to get back to VA on Tuesday morning. All things went as planned from AZ to Pittsburg, however...that's where things started to fall apart again. Didn't get home till around midnight, but...I'm back, I had a great trip, and that's all anyone can really ask for. Thanks for the "killer" time Beth Anne :)