blogs t r e t c h

between a roux and a bechamel

Friday, December 30, 2005

Look Alikes Cont'd

OK, this face recognition look alike thing just keeps getting better. When I used this picture, my #1 match: Sting! All the hits on that one were men, except for Charlize Theron, and Camilla Parker Bowles (insert joke about her being practically a man anyway).


Jamie, for the record, is J.Lo, followed by Pamela Anderson & Annette Benning.

Who do you look like?


As we know, I love celebrity look alikes. Now there's a tool to find out what science has to say about who you look like! (via Catherine)

My first attempt: I got nothin.

Second attempt, with this photo:

(note: I'll * ones I've heard before)

Kate Winslet* (this is the one I hear most often)

Zhang Ziyi (I look over 80% Asian?)

Elisha Cuthbert

Liza Minnelli

Sania Mirza

Hillary Rodham Clinton

Keira Knightley

Julianne Moore

Hilary Duff

Jennifer Aniston

Third attempt, with this pic if Stacy and I:

(and, these were all REALLY high percentage of likeness):

Brigitte Bardot

Naomi Watts*

Christina Ricci (?)

Jaqueline Kennedy Onassis!

Andie MacDowell*

Julia Roberts

Britney Spears (gross)

Helena Bonham Carter

Katie Holmes

Natalie Portman*

Shania Twain

Janet Leigh

Vivian Leigh

Anna Kournikova

Demi Moore

Jennifer Lopez!

Hillary Swank

Kate Winslett

Celine Dion

Kim Novak

Lessons learned: Stacy is old hollywood beautiful, and Stick has no peers.

Who do you look like?

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Match That Ass Up

At Friday night's gift exchange party, some of the girls thought it would be fun to take ass shots to see if people could figure out which derrier belonged to which girl. Now that challenge is yours, loyal readers! See if you can match an ass up from Column A to a face from Column B!

Ass 1 / Colleen

Ass 2 / Jenna

Ass 3 / Marissa

Ass 4 / Nina

Ass 5 / Felicia

Leave your best guesses in the comments!

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

When I Grow Up and Get Married, I'm Livin' Alone!

So, as of about 1:30 this afternoon, I officially live alone. Big White Mike has packed up and moved out for more German pastures (well, mostly moved out -- his dad will be along sometime this week to gather his remaining furniture). In answer to your question, no, I will not be recruiting a new roomate. This has caused 2 primary reactions from the people I've told:
  1. Aren't you gonna be lonely?
  2. Aren't you gonna be poor?
In response to part 1: Maybe at first, but on the whole, not so much. I'm an only child, so solitary behavior suites me. Living with Mike has been a lesson in sharing space -- mainly the space in front of the TV. No bad talkin about Mike, he was a fantastic and generous roomate who helped me with absolutely anything I asked him to, but my GOD I will be so happy to watch TV in peace again. It'll just be nice to watch a show with an attractive female lead without hearing about her hot ass and/or rack; or watching an episode of a sitcom of some kind without a constant stream of nonsequetor references to previous episodes or other generally funny things, without explanation. The lack of "so how was your day" conversations will probably lead me to chatting up Stinker and Mr. Plant more than I already do at first, and I'll miss having somebody to eat dinner with, but I think the transition will go smoothly.

In response to part 2: My god yes. Keep your fingers crossed for a raise in my future, otherwise I will have to cease and decist my current dining-and-drinking-out-laden lifestyle. Or at least highly modify it.

I just got the feeling that I misspelled about 10 words in this post, but I'm running on fumes right now so you're just gonna have to accept them and move on, while I continue to wonder at exactly what rate my intelligence is slipping from me.

Bon Voyage, Mike Coleman! Say "hi" to Deutchland for me!

Gettin Gifty With It

Originally uploaded by AMattos.

I should write ads for Old Navy.

The picture posts may seem a bit lazy, but every blogger needs a break. Hope you all are enjoying some time off as well! More pics of the gift exchange party are available here.

Monday, December 26, 2005

Season's Greetings!

Originally uploaded by AMattos.

A nice little family photo on Christmas night at my place ~ Amanda, Kevin, Tyler and Jenna. Ho ho ho!

More pics up on flickr.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005


Pretty much sums up my current situation. I'm sitting in my office, waiting for traffic to die down so I can go pick up Le Stink from my mom's. But the traffic, it just keeps on comin'. But it's so bad, I can't bring myself to go out and join the masses one each and every artery around Tysons Corner. I really wish my office could relocate from Thanksgiving to New Years.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Can't... Stop... Smiling...

  • That Redskins win is still putting a bounce in my step, I can't deny it. A lot of poeple seem to feel that way.
  • I learned this weekend that I like caviar! Sophisticateds t r e t c h
  • We come from the land of the ice and snow...
  • Who makes more money -- Draco Malfoy or Santa?
  • You've probably already seen it, but the X3 trailer is bitchin.
  • Wanna thrash some wicked powder? Head to Dubai! (Did I just say, "thrash some wicked powder"? I'm so xtreme.)
  • Today's word of the day is "digerati." That's "persons knowledgeable about computers and technology." In other words, those who thrash some wicked code. OK I'll stop now I swear.
  • And God said, let there be end of the year countdown lists.
  • Trashing wicked Lost theories. Very interesting. It would take a fair amount of reserach for me to buy into it, but it sounds more like the way the minds of the Lost writers work than anything else I've read.
  • I can hardly wait till the Nip/Tuck finale tonight. As many of you know, my money is and has been on Matt. They really softened him up/made him seem less crazy last week, but he's still my main suspect. The possibility of it being Liz never crossed my mind till I saw the preview for this week's episode though, and it's intriguing. I think Quentin & Gina are both way too easy to point the finger at. It could be Ava, but she's been absent all season and once again, I think that's too easy. But she was indeed creepy as all hell. The show is way too dependant on Christian, Sean & Julia for it to be any of them (IMHO). Who do you think is the Carver?
  • One more: It's linked every which way but loose about the internets, but the Chronic(les of Narnia) rap from this weekend's SNL is hiiiiiiiiiilarious! I thought, "What? How could a Narnia rap be funny?" But it's about two dudes going to the movies, not really about Narnia. Seriously, watch. You'll laugh. My favorite part: "I love those cupcakes like McAdams loves Gossling."

Monday, December 19, 2005

Like a syrup and powdered sugar sandwich

Victory is always sweet. But yesterday... yesterday was the kind of win that life long fans quite literally dream about. Growing up a 'Skins fan, there's been a lot of inherent hardship in my time. Sure, that may sound dramatic, but it's true. It's not easy loving a team that has such a rocky relationship with success. I'll save you the epic ode to the return of Joe Gibbs, the rebuilding of a team, etc. But this season has had some great highs and lows. Beating Dallas -- just barely beating them -- in week 2 had me on cloud nine for quite some time. To beat the team we've got such a storied rivalry with twice in the same season... it's just amazing. And yesterday we STOMPED all over the Cowboys. In summation, I'm really freakin happy. Have a look at one of the most beautiful sights I've ever seen:

Have a great day everybody, especially all my fellow Redskins fans!

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Hip Hip Hooraaaaayyy!!!

What a weekend!! Following what was quite possibly... nay, probably the most stressful week of work I've ever had, this weekend has been just fantastic. Friday night I got a visit from Miss Meagan, fresh in town from Boston. She helped me get all dudded up and sent me off to Sean and Danny's Christmas party. Total college reunion, and such a blast. Hilarity ensued left and right. My motto of the night was "I can't stop talking!" And it's always nice to see the best dressed versions of your friends, even if it did pretty much feel like a DU date function circa 2002. And yay for Cat being in town!! I sadly forgot to bring my camera along to this party, so I'll have to wait to see what other photographic evidence compiles. After loading up to the gills on wine and champaign, I reeled Alison in with me and we headed into la ciudad for Tom and Catherine's (no, not TomCat's) Christmas party (aka, the DCist/bloggers Christmas party). We scooped up miss Liz on the way and had such an awesome time. It's always funny being somewhere and hearing "And that's blogs t r e t c h over there..." Seeing lots of ePeople come to life was great fun. And of course the DCist lot is always great to hang out with. Lots of not-to-be missed discussions about books and other great stuff. Video game-based karaeoke. Hey look, I'm in a picture! (kind of) But my favorite part went like this:

scene: Liz and Amanda decide to pack it in and head home. Waiting in line for the bathroom before they depart, they hear the word "Dumbledor" very distinctly 3 times coming from the main room.

Amanda: I gotta get in on this! (Amanda darts off to bust in on the Harry Potter discussion)

After not so delicately crashing this conversation, we ended up having a very long, academic discussion of all things HP ~ morality, good/evil, fates, etc. It was fantastic. I was, to put it lightly, in heaven.

Not quite so heavenly was my Saturday morning/afternoon, when all the wine caught up with me. Yeeeeee.... Liz took me home and we consumed some Roswell DVDs and some mac n cheese. Finally got the motivation to shower, run my errands, and head over to mom's shin dig. What a great time I had! Lots of my favorite family friends and friend friends. By far the most exciting news of the evening was that DIANA IS ENGAGED!!!!!

Like how I burried the lead?

Clint proposed Friday night. The ring is beautiful and so perfect for her! She is quite literally my oldest friend. I can't believe she's getting married!! Clint, you're getting the greatest, nicest, kindest, smartest, most wonderful girl I know! Treat her right or you'll answer to me. I could not be happier for you D!

Also noteworthy was that Stinker is awesome and wore the Christmas necklace I made him all night, whereas Tink was embarassed by his and refused to leave the 2nd floor with it on. Here's Stinker being adorable.

More pics are up on Flickr. Now I must get some sleep before heading up to FedEx tomorrow to watch MY REDSKINS pummel the Cowgirls. LET'S GO REDSKINS!!!!!

Friday, December 16, 2005


I've seen this before, but it's pretty cool every time. Can you read it?

Can you raed tihs? Olny 153 plepoe on mepysca can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a tatol mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Support Stuff!

The always productive mind of Drew has offered up another gem: The Support Stuff ribbon magnet. For the soccer mom who supports everything.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

It's 6:03 a.m., do you know where your children are?

1. I'm at work before my alarm normally even goes off. Depressing.
2. I really really really don't like that new "laffy taffy" song.
3. Big ups to Robbie Tommasone for reminding me of "haHA!"
4. I heart the staff at my Starbucks.
5. Where is my coffee
6. Where is it
7. Bye bye -- I'm off to help severely injured soldiers and military spouses find jobs.

It's 5 a.m., no witty headlines shall ensue

Apparently the news team of Early Today (the national broadcast that comes on NBCbefore Joe Krebs and the gang, who come on before Today) are held to absolutely no journalistic standards (p.s. -- that was me channeling a disgruntled DCist commentor). Before they launched into the minute long discussion of "I wonder what made Prince go back to a record label?", they did a piece on iPod accessories for Christmas. I'm pretty sure The Daily Show's graphics department developed the little floating header that was posted next to the anchor's head, because it said, "Pimp Your iPod." Since when did that word become fodder for serious application in national news? Dear God I'm tired. Oooh, now they're talking about sheep who sing jingle bells. This is hard hitting stuff folks. If you're ever up at 4:15 anytime soon, definitely check it out.

Monday, December 12, 2005

A Brief Departure

The U.S. Military will be in posession of my undivided attention this week, so I'll have next to no time to be bloggy. These pictures of the cutest kitten brothers ever, Stinker and Tinker, should tide you over in my absence.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Update on Turtletown

GordonBShumway: so i apologize for being so amiss in my blogreadings these days of late, suffice-it-to-say it's been busy. however things in turtle town are looking better, if not completely on the mend. I've used our good friend, Craig, 's list to find a new aquarium on the cheap for the young sir, and in the meanwhile he's learned the defensive properties of his shell. While he is visibly taking some hits to his crunchy outside, he is at least protecting his gooey center now and his neck is healing noticeably. He gets daily treatments of neosporin. I'll send pics of his new digs once he gets set up. Expect it to be like an episode of cribs where he pulls out the bottle of "crystaaaaaal" from the bubbling treasure chest or some shit.
mads t r e t c h: shower, christmas cards, movies with mom, NOT DRINKING
GordonBShumway: ps - i'm drunk
GordonBShumway: pps - i did the superhero quiz, and i'm iron man. "Inventor. Businessman. Genius."

Also, in case you were wondering, this is a prime example of why I love Chris Hoy.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Just a thought

Caps for ball point pens seem really unnecessary. Mine live pretty perpetually on the unscrewy end, not the inky end, and the pens never go dry or anything. I suppose the purpose is mainly for not writing on things you don't intend to, but, has anybody had a ball point pen dry out in recent memory? Just curious. When I get really, really, really busy at work, my mind wanders to innane things like this to ballance the tide.

Oh Irony, Oh Irony, How Viscious Are Thy.... Branches

So, today was influenza vaccination day at work! Given my childhood replete with pneumonia and other various sicknesses, I'm a big proponent of the flu shot. And a free flu shot at work -- even better!! My arm hurts like a bitca*, but I'm full of innoculatey goodness, so I can't complain.

Or can I!?!

About an hour after I got my flu shot, Sarah calls in. She's out sick today. Just got back from the doctor. It's the flu.

So, as we all get poked and pricked, we're probably also all infected. Whoopdieflippindo!

Things aren't all bad though. Got the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack playing, filled up my M&Ms dispenser with red & green ones, got some holiday post it notes, and I have tomorrow off. So ho ho ho, the flu must go!

*10 awesome points to anyone who gets the Buffy reference here.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

It almost slipped my mind

How could I have possibly forgotten to congratulate the one and only Miss Beth Anne Tommasone on landing a real job! That's doing exactly what she wanted to do with her masters! And right in her own bustling metropolis of Harrisburg, PA! So happy for you BAT! What a big week -- new job, turning 25 -- what's next??

Hi, I'm Grace

Me and my eternal lack of coordination have twisted my ankle and am running late to work due to the icing and whatnot. I've used this extra time, however, to make a wicked awesome mix.
  • "So Lonely," The Police
  • "Lake of Fire," Nirvana Unplugged
  • "I Never," Rilo Kiley
  • "End of the World Party," Medeski Martin & Wood
  • "Wake Up," The Arcade Fire
  • "Summer Skin," Death Cab
  • "Damaged Goods," Gang of Four
  • "Jonathan Fisk," Spoon
  • "Modern World," Wolf Parade
  • "Hellodrama," What Made Milwaukee Famous
  • "History of Lovers," Calexicy/Iron & Wine
  • "The Lover's Rights," The Rosebuds
  • "Cold Hands (Warm Heart)," Brendan Benson
  • "You've Got To Hide Your Love Away," The Beatles
  • "Just Pretend," The Bens
  • "Emily Kane," Art Brut
  • "I Bet You Look Good On The Dance Floor," The Arctic Monkeys
  • "Superpowers," D plan
  • "Sovay," Andrew Bird
  • "The Greatest," Cat Power

Monday, December 05, 2005

Oh man

So, I was all ready to write this really happy post about what a great weekend it was, with Jenna's birthday, a great dinner at Al Crostino, a fun night at the Red Room, Sean Galdo's goodbye fest, more Roswell binging, decorating my house for Christmas, a Redskins win, cooking a great meal, listening to Christmas music....

Then I get to work this morning and am reminded that we have a meeting at Walter Reed that I'd forgotten about. I raced home, changed out of snow gear into meeting clothes, raced back, navigated (with difficulty) to WRAMC, and finally found the base entrance.... and that's when the trouble started. I'll save you the details, but hyper-responsible and organized me got a $100 ticket (a moving violation!) (they spared me the other $300 one) for not having propper paperwork with me. FUCK. And if you weren't sure, getting a ticket on a military base is definitely scarrier than getting a regular ticket. No matter how nice they are to you.

Also, I coined a new term this morning: flurrious!

Friggin' A, what a Monday!

Oh, and check out pics from this weekend.

Friday, December 02, 2005

Jenna is 24 Today!!!!!!