blogs t r e t c h

between a roux and a bechamel

Monday, July 31, 2006

Summer Colds

Are the suck. There's something about painful swallowing when the sun is shining brightly that's just sort of insulting. I'll be spending my day making long drawn out decisions about moving from the bed to the couch, and vice versa. See you all in wellville.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Link Dump

  • Kinda mean, super funny: Pug Bowling
  • Kriston brings us the DC Free Recording Project. How cool is that?
  • Is Keira Knightly a meth baby? Cause that's not where belts go.
  • Oh BURN!
  • Proof! Alex Trebek is, in fact, an ass.
  • Perhaps this could lure me into seeing my first James Bond movie. If he can't do it, no one can.
  • Pommegranite frappucinos are delicious. Not a sermon, just a thought.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

The Guest on The Daily Show Tonight

Has no sense of humor. Whatsoever.

Sharon Weinberger - author, "Imaginary Weapons." Smart, interesting -- yes. Funny -- no.

What's with me and brevity lately? I'll try and muster some more thoroughly developed thoughts soon. And -- perhaps -- a few complete sentences.

Big Day!

Becky and Kevin! Free from the bone crushing pressure that is studying for and taking the bar exam!! Hip hip hooray!

Chris and Nelson! Born!! Way to go, guys.

What's On TV Right Now

  • NBC: America's Got Talent
  • Fox: So You Think You Can Dance
  • ABC: The One: Making A Music Star
  • CBS: Rock Star: Supernova
  • UPN: America's Next Top Model
  • Bravo: Project Runway

Two of my Favorite Things

  • White Cheddar Cheezits
  • Bar-B-Q Fritos

You better flip that frito dad, you know how I like mine.

Monday, July 24, 2006

Hurry Up, October 3

It seems like the Veronica Mars panel at Comi-Con would have been a heavenly afternoon. Ya know, for gigantic obsessives like myself. Here are a few pictures from Flickr detailing the action -- Dick/Ryan Hansen doing his best Michael Jackson impression, Logan/Jason Dohring with scruffy hair!, Veronica/Kristin Bell promoting her new movie and being beautiful, and hilariously receiving a package wrongly sent to her old apartment, which is now occupied by someone who was in the audience. I hope all 2 of the people that read the s t r e t c h and watch VMars enjoy those. I'll start crossing days off my calendar until the October 3 premier.

Old Friends are the Best Friends

Last night I got the rare opportunity to spend time with an old friend, Jan, and holy crap! He's the best! I hadn't forgotten how great Jan is, per se, but I hadn't seen him in a couple of years. He's just as weird and smart and silly and observant and insightful as always. I miss him already!

(I got to hang out with Stegmaier too, who I also love and miss. And got to meet his wonderful girlfriend. And Sam and Stacy, who I see a lot but not enough. We spent the evening eating crabs, being overwhelmed at an unexpected h.s. reunion party, remember how to (or not) do magic eye, and looking through my old (I mean flowered doc martins, flanel shirts, mushroom cuts and girls still taller than all the boys old) photo albums. So all in all, a great night. Now I'm filled with nostalgia for countless lunches shared with Jan in the Madison cafeteria and countless nights with the crew in Kevin's Basement. With a capital B.)

You can look at some really carelessly taken (due to hands covered in old bay) pictures from last night here.

And now I'm "up to my tits," as Samantha Bee would say, in headlines and ad copy. If you're in the area, come check out Cold War Kids, Midlake and Sound Team tonight at the Black Cat. It's gonna be good.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Dear MT

Hurry the f**k up.


Friday, July 21, 2006


I just noticed that this picture from my flickr page has been viewed 115 times. Considering that most pictures top out around 30, I'm wondering what the draw of this extremely unoriginal group photo is. I bet it's Nina's boots.

Good To Know

I just discovered that, with a few minior furniture moves, my office has plenty of space in which to do yoga. After finishing a really tedious project at long last, I absolutely had to s t r e t c h. Now I know that it's 100% doable. I hope my coworkers don't think sun salutations are weird.

Actually, I kinda do. I haven't built up enough wacko intrigue in my three plus years here.

Of Montreal Anyone?

I bought two ticketes to see Of Montreal at the State Theater next Saturday, with Tyler in mind. But he'll be in NYC (where he could, presumably, catch them on Sunday, in a pool). SO! Anyone wanna come with? Of Montreal is awesome. Totally, completely and utterly awesome. I love Of Montreal. Listen to them here. Join me, won't you? The State Theater is about 1 mile from my house, so it makes for maximum convenience and crashing ability. Oh, and did I mention how great Of Montreal is? Cause they are. Great!


It makes me really happy when I walk into the cafe at work and the fry cook knows to just make my regular breakfast sandwich order. He always checks to make sure it's not a bagel or a breakfast burrito kind of day, but I don't ever have to utter the words "sausage egg and cheese on wheat toast, please" anymore.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Please let this post...

I just updated my sidebar and when I went to view the 'stretch, nothing was there. Well, nothing but the sidebar. Yeah. So... um.. come back? Content? Please? I'm beggin ya here!

UPDATE: We are, as you can see, back up and running. A somewhat mysterious deletion of half of the code on my template was to blame. Aside from the hysteria associated with being afraid I'd lost hundreds and hundreds of posts, it was about 1/40th as frustrating as MT has been over at DCist lately. Anyhow, carry on my wayward readers.

The Wrens Will Change Your Life

WuhSarah: do you know what a portmanteau is?
mads t r e t c h: no, but if i had to venture a guess
mads t r e t c h: i'd assume it was a small brunette jewish bird, adored for her beauty and work in such avian films as garden state and the star wars prequels

The real definition is, ironically, exactly what I did above. I have a gift. Sarah stumbled upon the word "portmanteu" when she was reading the description of the Strawpedo. I'm not entirely sure I understand the mechanics of that one, but I am pretty sure that it seems way too difficult.

More Funny Dreams

This one comes from the mind of Diana, oldest friend, neighbor growing up, and she who deems me honorous and maid-like.
So the last thing I remember before waking up this morning is my running down to your house...your mom is outside shoveling snow and I'm asking if you are home. She responds "no, she's over at paris hilton's house". I think to myself, in the dream, gosh amanda's so busy. Then your mom hands me a flashlight and I leave.
What's been on your sleepy mind these days?

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Happy Happy Joy Joy

Between dinner with Alyssa, super fun hang out time at Sam's (Lauren Lane style) last night, coming home and Veronica Mars still being on tv, and coming in to work to a meeting that involved cup cakes, chatting and laughter, I am in a super awesome mood today! Just thought I'd share!

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Logan 4 Eva, and Other News

Spin Moves Are Tight

Work is still insane this week, so while I'm not posting regularly, enjoy this funny, though sideways, video of Tyler dancing in my living room, and pictures of Stinker and the beach this weekend up on Flickr (though I managed to somehow get no pictures whatsoever of the girls I actually went to the beach with, or the surf cabin we stayed in).

Thursday, July 13, 2006


Sometimes I hit Publish Post instead of Save As Draft. Disregard all Mid-Summer Music Reviews you may have read. They'll return, completed, shortly.

I Think I Just Threw Up In My Mouth A Little

Between MT and Gmail not working, and me having more work than I can shake Stick at, PopCandy's suggestion of has been my one online outlet today. I think the most nearly-disastrous casting mistake would have been giving Britney Spears the role of Allie Hamilton in The Notebook. Not only would the sappy among us have missed out on one of the best female leads in a chick flick EVER, Ryan Gossling and Rachel McAdams wouldn't have made a love connection. Three cheers to the casting director who dodged that bullet.

Side note to Sam, Stacy, Jenna and Kail: Stick's first birthday is coming up soon.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

New Fascination: Piglet Squids

Alyssa just sent me this link, introducing me to what is quite possibly the cutest underwater creature of all time.

This little creature is called a Piglet Squid. Further googling revealed that its real name is Helicocranchid, although the other pictures I found are a lot more jelly fish lookin than this little guy.

If anybody knows anything more about Piglet Squids, or has more cute pictures of them, please chime in.

Fine By Far

  • It occured to me this morning that it was about a year ago that Stinker and Tinker came into my life. Further inspection revealed that the true anniversary is July 7. What a wonderful year it's been! I've always been a pet lover, cats in particular. But this stinky little fur ball has really been an important addition to mi vida.
  • Tonight: As far as summer reruns go, tonight's pretty much top notch. Two hours of Gilmore Girls, two hours of Veronica Mars. My evening full of chores just became way more fun.
  • Saw Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest last night. Lemme tell ya -- if you thought Superman was disappointing, stay as far away from this one as you possibly can. I get the necessity to set up for your next sequel, really I do, but that was ALL this movie did. Not one story line -- not one! -- was resolved. Not a single. solitary. one. They took 2.5 hours to set up aproximately 37 story lines, then just ended it. Sure, LOTR and XMen gave us blue balls, but nothing compared to this. It was funny, good effects, exciting scenes, etc., but wow, what a disappointment.
  • Mmmmmmmm, Chris Cornell
  • Anybody else as stoked for the new season of Project Runway as I am? (Excluding Becky, of course, cause I already know that she's on pins and needles.)
  • Speaking of Veronica Mars, does anybody else think the chick at the top of The Superficial bears a striking resemblance to Kristin Bell?
  • Last night mom and I ate dinner in the food court at Tysons. And I realized whoa, I haven't been to a food court in forever! Delicious discovery: the pot stickers at the Taka Grill. Bizarre discovery: salads are really hard to come by in a food court.
  • Best quote of the morning so far: "Dubya's talking on tv, and it makes me ashamed of my accent." -Alyssa Bell
  • I love me some Kelly Clarkson, for certain, but homegirl needs some serious sartorial help.
  • Drew Barrymore, however, continues to be the shit. I was just thinking this morning about how around age 13, she was my style inspiration in just about every move I made, from baby doll dresses to hair cuts. Many years later, she's still got a sense of style worth emulating. Drew, I'm sending a great big "You Go Girl" in your direction.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Only In Dreams

Tyler emailed me the story of his dream last night, and it was just too good not to share. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Me and Kail lived in Europe, either Paris or London, and had just gotten drunk at a bar. We met some European guy, and Kail started to put me on the spot by telling this dude about my secret, which was that I was a vampire and could fly, and I can't have people knowing that, so I kinda sucker punched him w/ a left. His nose started bleeding, but we both apologized for our rash actions soon after. He should've known better though. But later, I decided to show people, and I did incredible flight stunts in what looked like Rome, and then I met the actor who plays Nate from Six Feet Under, at some sort of fancy dinner party on a patio.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Farewell Joey Dear

Last night the old gang got together to send Joey off to Chicago in style. From the blind-folded trip to Dr. Dremos to the Joey Trivia and shooting the shit with people I don't see nearly enough of, the night was fantastic. You can peek in on the action on Flickr. Joey, you'll be missed. Stegmaier, good luck with your new roomie. You should take this opportunity to clear the apartment of any and all giant stuffed animals.

Friday, July 07, 2006

So what if I like Hot 99.5? You're ugly.

The more and more time that passes this summer, the more glaringly obvious it becomes. I love "Hips Don't Lie." Whenever those opening horns let me know that Shakira's about to invade my radio, I start moving like I come from Columbia. It's undeniable! What is it about summer months that make pop music so much more inviting? And, when is the new Justin Timberlake song coming out?

UPDATE: Wow. How horribly disappointing. The new JT song is le suck. See for yourself on his MySpace page. JT -- dump Timbaland and stick with Pharell, please.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Set your DVRs

Because I have a feeling that The Daily Show's treatment of this story will be worth watching.

Emmys Schlemmys

Well, the noms are in. Surprise, surprise, they overlook everything good! Well, I mean, not everything. But the show that really shook me up, down and all around this year was (duh), Veronica Mars. As a dyed in the wool Buffy fan, I'm used to Emmy snubs, so it comes as no surprise that a show that manages to be smart, poigniant, dramatic and funny falls to the "uncategorizable" fate, and therefore gets no love. I get that. Whatever. But come on -- Lauren Graham's role on the Gilmore Girls is and has always been magnificent. Throw her a nom, pretty please? It's good to know that I'm not the only one feeling this way. When will the powers that be match wits with viewers at large? I mean... we're talking the tv watching public here, it's not exactly MENSA. But maybe it should be. That way everyone would be watching Veronica Mars, and no would would be at all interested in the Blue Collar Comedy Tour.

UPDATE: Major reprieve. Thanks to PopCandy for pointing out that the "Trapped In A Closet" (Scientology) episode of South Park is nominated for an Emmy.

On the Sad Tip

The Blazer is officially gone. My eyes actually filled up with a few tears when Sam sent me these pictures. It is officially the end of an era. That car took me and many of my friends through more moves, trouble, fun, and general good times than I can count. Goodbye, sweet Blazer.

And also, Benjamin Hendrickson, the actor who's played Hal on As the World Turns my entire life commited suicide this weekend. When you grow up watching a soap, a habbit usually passed down from your mom, the actors that are on it for a long time are kind of family-ish. You "know" them your whole life, so it's definitely a sad sad day for CBS soap fans.

Butterstick Bash: Tonight!

What are you doing tonight? No plans? Great! DCist is throwing a happy hour to celebrate the first birthday of our beloved panda, Butterstick. Black and white attire is encouraged, but not required. There will be great music, great people, and -- maybe! -- some birthday confection.

Where: Chief Ike's, Adams Morgan
When: 7pm, TONIGHT!

If the Song's Any Indication of the Movie...

Then this song from Snakes on a Plane should be fair warning to us all that no amount of irony will make the movie worth our several dollars. Well, maybe matine price...

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Hangin Around

I often take for granted some of the zanier aspects of day-to-day office life in a creative environment. I was just taking a stroll around the good old 9th floor and made particular note of some things that probably aren't featured in your office.
  • Life-size cardboard cut outs, including Glinda the Good Witch, and Andy McKelvey, founder of Monster
  • A stuffed lamb sitting about 6 feet above ground, perched atop cardboard boxes
  • A ficus tree decorated with christmas lights and homemade ornaments, including: pictures of employees, Redskins and shopping network celebrities; a rubber glove as the start atop the tree, a toilet piggy bank, a crashing plane, a toploess man, and more
  • A light box
  • Many magazine inserts/brochures/various printed pieces that somebody has deemed cool and placed on the Idea Area
  • A wall of paper flowers
  • An OC calendar
  • A jelly bean dispenser
  • An endless supply of Coke products
  • A library full of photo and art books
  • A swear jar
  • A few razor scooters
  • More than one office full of colorful giveaways, like tshirts, triangle-shaped highlighters, mugs, stress balls, etc.
  • More pencils, glue sticks and markers than you've seen since 3rd grade
What's in your office?

geekouts t r e t c h

Thanks to PopCandy for linking to this unaired Buffy The Vampire Slayer pilot. It has some plot points in common with the real pilot, and the hair/weight/clothes of the cast members, and casting in general are very amusing. Particularly the ridiculously bad Willow, who they cast as 100% pathetic instead of geeky/loveable with a babe underneath. And check out the various fonts -- title credits, The Bronze. AND! Jonothan was in it! Ha! A lot of the seeds were there, but the way the characters and dialogue were polished for the real deal is pretty interesting. To someone like me. Who was/is obsessed with Buffy. Forever. And always.


Why must work-provided computers suck so magnificently? And crash repeatedly? And never, ever allow for a complete transition of files, emails or bookmarks? Ever? It's one of the world's great mysteries. And, this appears to be one of the world's oldest laptops.

My bookmarks have all been adiosed, so leave a comment with your URL if I should be reading your blog.

Back in VA, for more than 3 days this time

I'm back from yet another beachy excursion, this time to Stone Harbor. To put it simply, we had the best time. Meagan, Beth and Alyssa joined the Mattoses in our little house on Pleasure Bay for three days of excess -- excess food, excess drink, excess sun, excess fun. We went to my favorite restaurant in the world, went boating, watched the boat parade, the girls beat the boys in trivial persuit, I won $425 in Atlatnic City, and ate enough red meat to sink a ship. You can see some pictures here.

Also, for those of you who haven't figured it out yet, mine and Stumpy's phones got switched at some point late Friday/early Saturday. So if your texts or calls have gone unanswered, that's why. You can email me or call me at home until Saturday, when my phone and I are reuinted.

Oh, and happy 4th of July! I ended up riding out the majority of the holiday with Liz, and without power. But I hope all of you that braved the elements for fireworks had a blast!