Horrifying

It's one thing to be a hopeless junkie, but Pete Doherty may have just raised the bar to unforgiveable predator.

See for yourself.

Last Night Was Fun

But today... today I hates like I hates hobitses. My feelings are encapsulated by Alyssa in the following statement:

v o x x y m i a: i am seriously concentrating on not laughing or getting naked

Wish us luck today.

For What It's Worth

The Strokes put on a fantastic performance last night at DAR. Alas, DAR still sucks for a rock show. You can't feel the bass or percussion in that set up, and it really takes a big part of the concert going experience away from you. But that said, The Strokes were awesome. Julian Casablancas is such a rock star. And, his package was visible from Section G, Row D -- which is nowhere near the stage. Carrying all that weight around probably explains his hunched over posture and geriatric jazzercize dance moves. Look for Jason's review up on DCist later today.

Ascending Norms

The intricacies of elevator-specific social norms are one of the first pieces of corporate life most people pick up. When it's ok to spark up banter, to push the button or request a floor, how to file out, etc. There aren't hard and fast rules, but there's certainly a general structure. There's one element of this structure that mystifies me. Just about everyone tends to abide by it, but I just can't make heads nor tails of it. Why is yawning an invitation to commentary?

I'm a pretty yawn-prone individual, especially in moments of inactivity (such as, standing still in a small, vertically moving box). Everytime a yawn creeps to the surface while I'm in the elevator, it for some reason forces my co-riders to discuss how it's too early, or too late, or too sleepy, or that time of day, or the likelihood of me having a late night, or how busy my work load is, or how much I would rather be at home in bed than in the elevator, or the effects of the weather on my slow and sleepy intake of air. What gives? If I see someone scratching their shoulder, I don't start pondering their most recent exposure to poison ivy, or discussing the merrits of moisturizing after a shower. I don't tell someone who's coughing that it's too deep and they need to see a doctor. It's not necessarily offensive to comment on my yawning, but everyone does it. I'm just a little confused. Why? Why is it so captivating to see a 24 year old less than perky as she heads to or from her office? Isn't our whole damn nation sleep deprived? Do I look particularly shocking when yawning? I just can't wrap my brain around it.
That, and the fact that while I can yawn with about 99% certainty of a subsequent discussion, I can still sneeze with only about a 50% chance of getting a "bless you" or some similar nicety. This is a very fractured observation, but I just want to know if anyone else experiences this, or has some idea of why it happens. Thoughts?

My Life is Officially a Sitcom

I've just been asked to speak at an elementary school's career day. I'm fully prepared to walk in and sit in a tiny chair in between a fireman and a doctor, each in full halloween-costume-appropriate uniforms.

In Case You Care

One ad campaign I really like right now: The Sprint 7pm series, with the singing and the adjective wheel. They're phenominal!

One ad campaign I really don't like right now: Hilary Duff, Dawn, Anna and Trannie schlep Candies at Kohls. I feel like I blinked during a "We go smackers for lip smackers" commercial 15 years ago. No thanks.

Dear Television Without Pity --

Please get better servers. It really pisses me off when your site crashes while I'm mid-recap. Please note that this happens approximately once every 3 pages. And it's incredibly annoying.

Thanks,
Amanda

What's Sexy

So, the powers that be (Victoria's Secret) have conducted a study to find out What's Sexy in 2006. They're not all wrong, but I'd like to submit my personal preferences. I'm going to skip the material questions and move right on to the people. I don't know about you, but geography and heavy metal don't really turn me on. Feel free to partipate in the highly scientific Blogs t r e t c h Foundation's What's Sexy? Survey in the comments section.

Musician
Male: Chris Cornell. Always and forever.
Female: Yeah, Shakira's pretty hot. But I think I'd still vote for Jenny Lewis.

Actor
Male: I'm gonna have to throw my weight behind Viggo Mortensen, with nods to Matthew McConaughey, Christian Bale, and Jakey Poo.
Female: Perhaps not the winner on the out and out classic beauty scale, but as far as I can tell women don't come much sexier than Jessica Alba.

Athlete
Male: I'm gonna vote for former Wahoo Jerton Evans. Seriously, just look at that guy.
Female: I guess I'll support Sharapova, mainly because of my embarassingly under-developed knokwledge of female athletes. Sexiest female athletic trainer though? Beth Tommasone, without a doubt.

TV Personality
Male: How, in any universe, would the world vote Jay Leno sexier than Jon Stewart? JON STEWART!
Female: It's an Ann Curry/Kelly Ripa toss up.

Observations from the Atlanta Airport

ike spivey: this country is fat

The Drunk Amanda Column

The DCist list serve is almost always a source of enjoyment throughout the day. In a recent discussion of a possible kegger, a new feature called Drunk Amanda was proposed. The suggested topics thus far include:

• "Drunk Amanda Interviews Adrian Fenty"
• "Drunk Amanda Attends Committee of the Whole Meeting"
• "Drunk Amanda Eats Sun Chips on Steps of the National Cathedral"
• "Drunk Amanda Speaks With LaRouche Supporters"
• "Drunk Amanda Rides a Segway"

The last has proved to be the popular favorite. Now I open it up to you, those who are familiar with Drunk Amanda and can thus speak to things she'd be entertaining discussing, or topics that you think a generally Drunk Amanda should take on. Go!

I Am So Happy Right Now

On the aforementioned dance-laden drive into work this morning, I decided that today's the day. The day I'd buy iPod speakers. I've wanted them forever (ever = aproximately a year and a half), but when Alyssa brought hers on our Central VA Romp Road Trip, the deal was sealed: I needed iPod speakers. I got into work early today, answered emails, did a little CNET research, then when no coworkers were in yet at 9:20, I said ok, let's do this. To Best Buy!

Well, Best Buy opens at 10. Luckily though, the adjascent Borders opens at 9, so I bought a few things, got a latte, and started reading A Staggering Work of Heartbreaking Genius. Ten pages in, I'm already loving it. That David Eggers is something else.

But that's off topic. So, at 10:03, I went to Best Buy. I bought my speakers. I was really happy. Then the parking lot attendant lady told me I looked beautiful today. Everything's comin' up Mattos!

My beautiful Logitech mm50 speakers are set up on my desk. They even came with a little remote! The remote is the same size as some iPods! The joyous sounds of Jens Lekman, Coldwar Kids and The Cloud Room convinced my boss to ask me to provide the soundtrack to our Quarterly Meeting on Monday. See, these iPod speakers are doing things for me already! There are few things I love more than widening other people's musical spectrums. I'm thinking a couple spring time-appropriate obscure indie rock tracks, a little Spoon (everyone's gotta love Spoon, right?), some Sam Cooke, a little Prince, The Police... Suggestions are welcome.

So the moral of the story is that iPod speakers are wonderful, it's spring and that's awesome, the coconut mocha at Borders is gross, and be careful with scissors (especially when opening boxes, as you could slice open your finger and have to find out where the office first aid kit is kept).

Where In the World is Mike Evans?

No, I'm not going down Drew's bunny trail. But this morning, as I was sitting in my work parking lot, waiting for "Don't Stop Till You Get Enough" to end so I could continue my early morning in-car dance session and start the day off right, I saw a familiar figure pass by my windsheild. As he turned around to enter the stairwell, I saw his face and am 99% sure it was Mike Evans. Anybody know what he's up to these days? In particular, if he's living in NoVa and working on Greensboro Drive in Tysons Corner? We've already got Charlie Pastor, Charlotte Edelen and myself representing JMHS in this building, might as well add a "Little" Mike Evans to the mix too.

Late Afternoon Groove

I'm probably the last person on the internet to post about Gnarls Barkley, and I'm sure that every hip human in existence has been listening to "Crazy" for months. I heard it for the first time several weeks ago, then forgot about it. Then I was reminded of it this weekend, and can't stop listening. Gnarls Barkley is Cee-Lo and Danger Mouse; it's a rare occasion when two singularly awesome entities combine and make something that's actually good (just ask DCeiver), but they've done it. "Crazy" is so hot right now. (Side note: I really need to find a new way to say that.) That Violent Femmes cover is pretty dope too. You can listen to both on their MySpace page. Expect this song to fill the same gap as "Feel Good Inc." filled last spring. I.e., complete hip shaking ( or roller skating, as the case may be) media saturation. They also should win some sort of award for their press photos (like this one), which are fantastic.

I Think I Need Help

Because I totally dreamed about Aaron Echols getting off for Lilly's murder as a result of the whole planted DNA scenario.

Question: Where would Kendall have gotten Lilly's blood from?


Oh, and, duh, the Bush Crash plot thickens. Major wrench in all pre-existing theories with this whole Fitzpatricks/Kendall shenanigans. But Woody's still way too creepy to be completely innocent. Knowing the way the VMars writers work, we have way too many incriminating clues at this point for either one of those scenarios to be true. I'm starting to get a little red herring-weary. Thoughts? (Don't you love posts written for all 2 of my friends -- Catherine, Allison -- that watch Veronica Mars?I know that you do.)

Nominee for the Away Message Hall of Fame

Auto response from normcdnld: i wish my grass was emo so it would cut itself

Help Me Do My Job

The Situation: Need to make company letterhead in Word, where the images are locked into the background and can't be moved. I tried the advanced alignment screen --> absolute position, lock anchor. It works in regards to being able to type over the text succesfully, but you can still move the images if you click and drag. Anybody out there in internet land know how to accomplish this seemingly impossible feat? I've taken all of the online Word tutorials one girl can stand in a single day.

It's a day late, but for what it's worth

Music for a Rainy Day

I started to make some headway through the stack of CDs I've been sent by promoters this weekend, so I thought I'd share a couple of the stand outs. On the not DC front, we have Margot & the Nuclear So and So's. And locally, we have Deleted Scenes, who were my favorite of the albums I listened to yesterday. I'm gonna try and cover these guys in this month's Three Stars, so stay tuned for more!

Err, I hit "publish" very prematurely. I also meant to mention Matt Curreri, who I saw Friday night at the rockingest house party I've been to in a while. He's west coast-based, but if you have a chance to check this guy out, do so. He played after Tyler's new band, The Boyfriends, who were also teh awesome. Their three-song catalog is better than most full lengths I've heard lately. So keep your ears and eyes peeled for both.

Just When You Think It Couldn't Get Any Worse

Some of you may remember this horrific experience that Catherine had a few months ago.

Well, I just had the same experience. Months after that song rose to inexplicable popularity. In the elevator. On the Razor phone of a guy my dad's age. My dad's age! He was definitely the tanning salon kind of middle ager, grasping at all possible straws of youthful cool. In case you're curious, overly tanned middle aged dude, that is not cool. Not cool at all. Consider yourself warned.

And in Related Birthday Well Wishes

Some belated love goes out to Becky, Dan, BabyKull, Alan and Mrs. Young. MWAH!

Happy Birthday, SMG

It may be Good Friday to some, the debut performance of The Boyfriends to others, but for me, today is Sarah Michelle Gellar's 29th birthday. I'll pause to let you all remember what a massive nerd I am for all things Buffy, accept it, and carry on. Some of you may have mistakenly assumed I'd moved on to Marsier pastures, but don't kid yourselves -- the Buffster will always be #1 in my heart.

I doubt it was intentional, but in some strange alignment of the planets, arguably the best -- and my personal favorite -- Buffy episode was on this morning (FX, 7am, M-F). That episode is, of course, Becoming Part 2, where Buffy has to kill Angel to save the world. As sad as it always makes me, I can't not watch it when its on. I think I'm going down a bunny trail here. Back to the point: the universe loves ya SMG, and I do too. Happy Birthday!

P.S., when searching for an image for this post, I had a gut check moment, realizing that I could name the magazine and approximate release date for almost all of the images that came up, because I bought every single BTVS-related piece of media I could get my hands on in high school. I swear I had a life with real people in it too. Really!

Local Music, like, Rocks for teenagers, and stuff!

From one of the worst, most pointless articles I've ever read, comes a statement with such misplaced motivations that it hurts my feelings:

"If I can't do music, I'm going to have to lose my earrings and sell out," he said. "Given the way we look, I don't see ourselves doing anything else."

Seriously? Seriously. First of all, the entire article is complete focus-free crap. Kids are in a band! They scream! They almost broke up! They changed their image so they could be more band like! They make fun of other people who dress like them! They need to stay in a band so that the spaces in their ears don't go unused! This is everything wrong with scenesters. I always knew I didn't like emo, and now I know why: crying about your girlfriend is apparently not a way to express yourself, but a way to get famous and be cool. Yuck. Just yuck.

I also particularly hate the part that derides people who just come to shows because they listen to Fallout Boy, but don't know the roots of where that music came from.

a) You guys are not musicians. You're looking for a niche to define yourselves by. Akin to the Klosterman Real World effect, you're saying hey! I'm in an emo band! It makes me special. Don't proclaim generations of inspiration, because you have clearly modeled yourselves off of this guy. And I'm slighly uncomfortable that this is the second mention he's gotten on my blog today.

b) Good for those people going to the shows! Regardless of what they listen to or don't, doing things like going to concerts is precisely how you learn new music and how to appreciate new things.

c) I hope you weren't turned off to music in general by these shows you've been going to. Your classmates, the ones in the band, are even less cool than Fallout Boy.

d) Screamo sucks. You guys don't even like doing screamo -- your lead singer's got a throat ache, and the chick jeans you all went out and bought hug his balls too tight. The only reason you started screamo-ing is that you were all strummy and sounded like everyone else. Well, now you (probably) sound like every other screamo band. Only lamer. I'm building up quite a bit of unnecessary hatred for this band of 18 year olds that I've never listened to before. I just really hate manufactured crap that tries to pass itself off as being unique and artistic. If you're going to be manufactured, embrace it! Don't feign ennui and artistic lament. Get yourself a sponsorship from Candies, perform at a fictional club on a teen soap, contribute a song to an Amanda Bynes movie soundtrack! Then I can at least respect your honesty.

I hope these guys grow out of their horrible poserosity as their teen years dwindle.

And I hope that this is the first article this writer's ever written, because it's awful. Are you related to the band members? There's no conceit here -- screamo exists! Teenagers -- in and out of bands -- have MySpace pages! NoVa communites have venues where teen bands play! Being in a band is like, hard, but totally cool! And way better than being a waitor! What the hell is the point of this article?!?!

So, um, what did you guys think of the article? And, thanks Ryan, for pointing this out to me and injecting massive doses of ire into my morning.

UPDATE: The DCist take on this drivel

I'm Gonna Go On The Record

And say something that may make some of you question the value of my opinions. But I'm going to say it anyway. One Tree Hill is a great f***ing show. I mean it.

It never fails to be surprising, touching, and more poigniant than most anything else. I tear up at some point of pretty much every episode. I won't go all spoilerific on your ass, in the event that I know anyone else in the world that watches it and hasn't seen tonight's yet, but the last moments were TV gold. TV gold!!

You may recall my previous statement that their Season 1 finale was on my all time top season finales list. I shit you not -- this is a quality show. It is undeniably a teen soap, taking its cues from the Dawson's Creeks that came before it, but there are some kernals of real quality in there. I swear it!

I mean, if Catherine can like Pepper Dennis, I'm allowed to like One Tree Hill.

And, it's only 10 minutes into Lost, but I'm getting the warm fuzzies already from a Rose/Bernard flashback episode. With "These Arms of Mine" playing over their introduction.

Unbelievable

I just saw this and am gawking so hard I couldn't possibly not share it with you, my eFriends. Behold, the F.O.U.S. ! (That's a reference to this, for those of you sleeping in the back of the class.)

Macrock Tried to Kill Me

And did a fairly thorough job. It was a great weekend though, full of music, friends, fun, interpretive dance and bible study. For photographic evidence, check me out. Seriously, my brain function is at about 13% its usual capacity today. Richmond + Macrock + Neko Case = 4 nights of fun, Monday of al;skdjfla;kfjalskfj;owiljr.

UPDATE: A Bell's pics are up here. Here's a little taste:


by foxxymia

Attention All OC Defectors

If you are a disenchanted former OC-watcher, consider yourself advised: it's gotten really, really, really good again. Really.

As Neptune Turns

I've been chattering with Catherine all morning about last night's super duper awesome episode of Veronica Mars. It also inspired me to read the TWOP write up, but as it wasn't ready yet, I stared reading last week's. It hit a certain nail directly on its head, so I thought I'd share it here, for any Mars-o-philes in my readership. Mainly bc. I don't know the HTML for a block quote to respond on UN.

I have to say, however, that Veronica's expressing a desire to get out of Neptune (which restates what she said in "One Angry Veronica" about wanting to have the car packed and running at graduation) makes me realize what's been wrong with Veronica's characterization this season. It's not that she's different; that was inevitable. It's that the only things she's wanted this entire season are to be with Duncan and to get out of Neptune, and for that matter, both of those wants have seemed tepid at best. Not that there's anything wrong with any person not having strong driving desires at any moment in time, but Veronica is a character, not a person, and a lead character with no strong wants is boring television and screenwriting death. I thought that, as the season went along, Veronica would develop some new passion, but she doesn't even particularly seem to want to solve her cases. It's not that she even has to be completely aware of her wants, but they have to exist. If her real wish is to get out of Neptune, then fine, but that isn't the most riveting dramatic choice I've ever seen, nor does it bode well for Season 3. The thing that's kept the show going, in my opinion -- other than crisp dialogue and great acting (and that will always make the show enjoyable for me) -- is that Logan, while often reprehensible, has enough driving desire for just about everyone on the show. But the show ain't called Logan Echolls, so as I said a while ago: Veronica, start caring -- it almost doesn't matter about what.

Thank you! The past two episodes have really both been excellent, and started to recapture some of that Season 1 je ne sais quoi. But I think that this observation is brilliant and precisely the cause of some of this season's malaise. But VM, with or without the malaise, still beats the pants off of about 95% of the other shows out there.

And, the dance scene... sigh! I sort of kind of searched YouTube for VM videos in hopes to be able to watch my favorite tv couple's intense dance scene repeatedly throughout thep day, and happily found several clips dedicated to Logan and Veronica. Yeah, it's rivaling my Buffy and Angel obsession circa 1998. If you're as losery as I am, you may enjoy these.

UPDATE: Bingo! Found the dance clip. Other completely lame people, enjoy.

Linkasaurus

• Seriously? This is news? This was going on in the hallowed halls of JMHS waaaaaaay back when I was there. Anybody else remember the Wyclef-assisted homecoming invitation?
  
• Just when you think you're in the clear, you get sucked into the earth.
  
• How To Spot a Baby Conservative
• Almost tempts me to break my "I will never appear on reality tv" vow.
  
• This is your boss. This is your boss on bondage.
  
• McSweeney's: A Wedding Toast by Katie Holmes' Former Best Friend
• Cell Photogs: It's art now!
• M'boy Chris gets mad crazy Deadspin love! (And 135,000+ hits in March. NBD.)
• I know a couple fellas who would disagree.
  
• Maybe it's just because our food writers are incredibly gifted, but this sounds delicious. So not my wheelhouse, but I'd love to go sometime if anybody's interested.
  
• Henry Rollins: On his way back home?
  
• Anyone else see a fatal OD in the near future? As Chris pointed out, late night partying and a bad work ethic are probably just her being really method right now. Fits right along with Marissa's current behavior.
  

And some video fun:

• Juggling amazingness. Be sure your sound is on.
  
• Truly bizarre... and a little creepy.
  
• In case you missed the Scientology Southpark, here ya go.
  

These Movies Look Good

Little Miss Sunshine

A Scanner Darkly

Trust The Man

A Prairie Home Companion

Holy Hilarious Batman!

Has anyone seen the new commercial on TBS, promoting their upcoming Lord of the Rings marathon? Playing "Secret Love" over a montage of Frodo and Samwise? Yeah. Chew on that. TBS really is funny!

Saved By The Bell Was Much Weirder Than Any of Us Realized at the Time

I just caught the end of the Dance Party episode (ya know, Casey Cassum, "The Sprain") of Saved By The Bell. Shocking -- all three finalists were from the gang. OK, I get the sitcom necessity there. Whatever. But, was it really necessary to have all three couples dance to the same song? Was it some bizarrely ineffectual attempt at leveling the playing field? It got me thinking about all the music that was ever on SBTB (A17, Zack & Kelly's song, for example). Always the wordless keyboard music that couldn't have coast more than $100 in royalties. I realize it was a low budget show, but for some reason, the same song being used for each couple really irked me.

PS, I'm at home watching tv bc. I'm working from here today, as my new windows get installed! Let's hear it for more efficient use of energy!!

Rock Star Hug!

So. I just had my first rock star experience. After an unfarkingbelievable show by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs tonight, I was lucky enough to partake in the meet and greet, thanks to their label who I've been working with lately. The show seriously blew my socks off; I was all prepared to tell Karen O that she was "joyous." Of course, I turned into a bumbling nervous shy kid. I got two signatures on my poster -- Karen and the drummer. They were all absurdly nice, but, here's the thing. I wasn't allowed to say who I really was. The event was only for retailers, so I had to say I worked at a record store. Now, most of you that know me well won't find it surprising that lying is not one of my strengths. I'm just really bad at it, so I don't do it much. So when the engaging and friendly drummer asked me where I worked, I forgot, mumbled, awkwardly panted out "FYE," then froze like a deer in the headlights when he asked if we sold vinyl and replied, "Not a lot." The dude was seriously kind and interested to talk to me, but I was an absolute mute. Doh! Then came my turn to take a picture with Karen. Ya know, the super cool re-inventor of bangs, the fashion icon. What did I choose to wear to this event? An old plaid shirt, and a ribbon in my hair. A RIBBON? A FUCKING RIBBON? What was I thinking?!?! I do not know. I'll get the picture back soon (my label friend took it on her camera), but I'm fairly certain a few key qualities will stick out.

-I tried to play it cool and not be too smiley or look any more sororityish than my fucking ribbon already did, but I was so nervous that when the camera pointed at me, my face auto-flashed into toothy grin. I'm fairly sure that the camera caught me in some awkward stage between teeth and no teeth.

-I probably cocked my head and will look even girlier/sillier.

-We will definitely look like different species, as she is wee and I am amazon.

She was so incredibly nice though, and kinda hugged me. My first rockstar hug!! Pretty sweet!! Regardless of the level of ohsoawfulness that picture will hold, it's gonna fucking rock, because it's fucking me and Karen O.

Oh yeah, btw, totally a huge Yeah Yeah Yeahs fan now. That show was g-r-e-a-t.

Wow

According to DCist, one year at D.C.'s St. Alban's (a private high school) costs more than 4 years at UVA cost me. And The Walkmen don't even go there anymore!

Grab My Pooper

This week's OC was teh awesome! Seth one-liners ("Ewe or grab my pooper?"), fights, sex, wake n bake, pissy Summer, Kirsten time!, MARISSA DOING YAY!!! I must admit I'm starting to kind of be ok with Ryan's Sadie-centric happiness, but are we seriously to believe that he's not going to do some swooping in to save Miss Marissa eventually? I'm still peeved at the unceremonious end to Ryan and Marissa's relationship; everyone's writing it off as torturous, but don't forget! They had a lot of good times! Including times that happened this season (achem, doing it for the first time, on the beech, in a tiki hut -- that was this year people!). I think they deserve a little more credit, it wasn't all bad. So, join me please, as I reminisce some of the good times shared by Ryan and Marissa.

Brushes with Celebrity

So I'm a little slow on the uptake when it comes to American Idol trivia, I'm not a devoted watcher. (But if I were a Watcher, I'd be devoted, just like Giles.) Anyhow, it just came to my attention that Carrie Underwood, last year's idol, was in my sorority! Not at my school, but, Underwood and I -- forever in the bonds of Sigma Sigma Sigma. Yeah, that's right! She's my sister.