I don't need another step between me and toast

For some reason the Mitch Hedberg references have been flowing like water the past few days. All these reminders inspired me to hit up YouTube in hopes of finding some videos I hadn't seen before. Here's a little montage for you to enjoy -- if you know Hedberg, these jokes likely aren't new to you, but he's never not funny. There are other Mitch highlights on YouTube, including his appearances on That 70s Show, Ed, Dr. Katz and Crank Yankers. Wow, this has got to be the least funny thing written about a funny person in history. So, stop reading and watch the clip!

My New Favorite Person to Hate!

Bloggy friends, meet Heidi, the idiot roomate to Lauren (L.C.) on MTV's new Laguna Beach spinoff, The Hills. I don't know that I've ever seen someone -- even on reality tv -- display such a dearth of intelligence. Here are a few samples of her meeting with the dean of her new school:

Describe yourself in high school. What were you like?
I did nothing -- never went to class, just shopped and stuff.

Have you looked at the curriculum?
No.

You know it takes a lot of work and experience to get to that party planning level of PR.
Really? It doesn't just happen right away?

No... would you be willing to work in retail sales?
Like actually working on the floor? No, I don't think I could do that.

Are you sure you're at the right school?
Yes.

She didn't get any smarter throughout the course of the episode. Instead of moving her stuff into her new apartment, she suns and makes new friends at the pool. She talks loudly while Lauren is on the phone with her new job. She risks Lauren getting in trouble at said new job by crashing their party and having a fight with her boyfriend at said party. I don't know what's worse -- if she really is that unconscious of the world around her as a result of rich girl disease, or if she is willing to take cues from MTV and let the world get to know her as an insipid moron. Either way, it's safe to say that I. Hate. Heidi. I'm fairly certain that I'll subject myself to this show throughout the summer, and I'm also fairly certain I'll hate every second of it. Bring on the Wednesday night social gatherings to get me away from the tv!

This is hard

Anybody got any ideas? Cause I don't think it's "For the Pope back," which is all I can think of, everytime I look at it.

*Phew

The twelve year old inside me can finally stop crying. The whole Jared Leto is gay thing that was bluzzing around last week (which I first heard about first hand via Jeff Simmermon at The Walkmen show), appears to have been a big joke. Haha, real funny. 12 year old me still loves you, but 24 year old me thinks you're a douche. Can we meet in the middle? Cause 18 year old me would totally go out with you still.

Aint No Weekend Like a Holiday Weekend

Cause a holiday weekend don't stop... for an additional 24 hours. This Memorial Day weekend I recovered from my back injury, went to a BI party, finally saw the 'stick (and many other wonderful things at the zoo; I learned that when the Golden Lion Tamarin habitat is a' rockin, don't come a' knockin!), bid Rosie's single days goodbye (Santi's pics soon to come), saw X3 (class 5 mutants are baaaaaaaad ass!), celebrated the life of Vienna, bbq'd with the women that bore Sam and I, accidentally bought a jump suit at target (I thought it was a dress -- anybody having a Three's Company themed party anytime soon?), attended a tea party (complete with cucumber sandwiches!), splish splashed at Felsha's (with Otis the Boxer), enjoyed some delicious shrimp tacos with mom, and some delicious coconut cream pie with many, many Mattoses. What did you do?

I can't believe I never caught this before

I'm sitting at home on a Friday night, watching Sweet Home Alabama, cause I'm cool and have friends and a life and stuff, and I just noticed something. The sheriff is the same actor who played Ronald Miller's nerd best friend in Can't Buy Me Love. You know, the one whose house got shit on. And, Patrick Dempsy is, of course, in Sweet Home Alabama as well. I wonder if they had the same casting director or something. By the way, hilariously unoffensive google image search results for you shit on my house.

Exclamation Point!!

Holy wow!!! This is what I get for not doing the music agenda for two weeks -- I miss out on things like the PRINCE VS OUTKAST DANCE PARTY at Black Cat!!! I am SO there! I just used way too many exclamation points!!!

I'm A Million

At some moment of over enthusiasm before The Walkmen started last night, a nerve in my left shoulderblade got pinched. It's happened to me before, happens once every several years. I'm not sure what movement or condition brings it on, but is usually sticks around for about a day and shakes itself off. Anyhow, I'm laid up today, and the fact that I'm home from work because my back went out makes me feel... less than young and hip.

In other news, The Walkmen were fantastic. Yet again, the sound in the venue was lacklustre while NPR recorded the live show. But, the guys kicked ass. Paul and Ham maintain their status as dreamy rock stars. Based on published set times, I was hoping I'd be able to get to DC9 in time for at least a bit of Georgie James' set, but no dice. I did get to see lots of always wonderful DCist faces and mingle with a generally cool selection of the DCist-reading community -- though I didn't get my DCist temporary tattoo, so that'll have to be remedied shortly.

At least being lame gives me the chance to watch the Lost finale.

If anyone knows some tricky back remedies, please let me know.

Tonight's The Night

Failed Miserably

An hour in and I've crumbled. Thanks to the powerful pull of Unrequited Narcissism, Cruel Sommer and DCeiver, I've beeing blog reading. I'm offically an addict. I'll just try and steer clear of USA Today and People.

Well

It's been a whopping 10 minutes and this is killing me already. Let's take a poll.

Which will today do more of?

A. Suck

B. Blow


Please submit your responses in the comments.

Bowing Out of the Blogosphere..... For Today Only

Had ya worried there for a sec, didn't I?

I will not read any blogs today, for I have yet to watch the Lost season finale. After having The O.C. spoiled for me, I'm not taking any chances. I will also not read any other pop culturey internets. Today will either be the most productive, or the most torturous day of my professional life.

The Big Happy Bow

A lot of series have called it quits lately. Because I'm a huge nerd for tv, this means I've seen a handful of series finales in recent weeks. They all made me smile and/or shed a happy tear or two, but they all had one thing in common -- tying everything up in a big happy bow. (Warning: Spoiler type statements follow) Foreman & Donna get back together! All of the Charmed Ones grow old & live happily ever after, and each has 3 children! Sydney & Vaughn retire happily with their daughter and subsequent son! I, naturally, like to see things end well for characters I've invested years of television watching energy in, but, it seems a bit lazy. Other shows have managed to wrap things up well, meaningfully, and without being predictably lame. Buffy didn't end with a Buffy/Angel wedding, it ended with possibility. The Wonder Years didn't end with Kevin & Winnie together, but it was fantastic. I don't really have a thesis here, I'm just slightly disappointed in the "well duh, I could have written that" response I've had time and again. Oh, and, while part of me appreciates the flash forward effect, subtle hints at happily ever after are a lot more effective than "SEE! THEY'RE HAPPY!! AND IT'S THE FUTURE!" These are my thoughts.

Things I Really Like Right Now, and Think You Should Like Too

• "When You Were Mine" by Prince, off of Dirty Minds. Oh how I love the purple one!
  
• The tv show Bones. Just snuck home for a steak sandwich and a wardrobe change at lunch, and watched my DVR'd season finale of this always enjoyable show while I was there. The plots aren't always the most thought provoking, but I love love love the whole cast, and the general pace of the show. If they rerun this summer, you should check it out.
  
• Alan Amerault. Welcome back to the fold.
  
• ELO
• My new job
• A Hundred Miles Off (the new Walkmen album)
• Knowing that somewhere out there in fiction land, Logan & Veronica are having a summer of love.
  

Spoon Me

How wonderful would an evening of Mates of State, Spoon & Death Cab be? My east-coastiness foils me again. Also, I wish I was going to the Pitchfork festival, for reals. I do, however, plan on buying my ACL tickets asap. No Spoon, but The Raconteurs and The Shins and many more should make up for it.

The Walkmen

Are tight. Check out my interview with Pete Bauer over on DCist. And check out my pics of The Walkmen at Macrock on Flickr.

UPDATE: Got some late comer responses from lead singer Hamilton Leithauser that I updated the article with. Now, I can't be certain, but I'm pretty sure he wants to hang out with me at DC9 because he's so impressed by my Buddy Holly detection skills. Which is fine by me, cause Ham is a hottie. All 6' a million" of him. So, go ahead and check out the update.

Stinker vs. the Bag

I mean.... what's he getting at? Is he trying to play piano with the song? Is he trying to pat his way into the bag's heart? Whatever it is, it went on for far longer than this video shows, with an occasional break to peek inside the bag, or dart his head around and make sure no attackers were on the approach. Oh Stinker, you'll never cease to amuse me.

A Strange Tide is Turning

Recently, I've been frequenting... Subway. Anyone that's lived with me or been on a road trip with me or tried to go out to lunch with me can attest that I'm not a Subway fan. Their veggies taste old and plasticy, and their meats are worse. Yick! But, by virtue of necessity, I discovered that I kind of enjoy a tuna sub on wheat from Subway (with red onions, banana peppers, cucumbers, mayo and mustard). And lately, I've been wanting tuna sandwiches. Often. I'm not sure when this sea change happened, but I'm not really willing to accept the fact that I'm a Subway customer. It kind of upsets me that I was one of the first customers to use their new touch screen ordering system. I'm worried that this may be a symptom of a larger shift. As my friends, I ask that you be on the look out for any other out of character behavior, and intervene promptly. No good can come of this.

The OC Season Finale -- OMFG

I finaly got to watch the season finale of The OC last night. Before I discuss it, I'd like to say that if you haven't seen it yet and plan on watching it, stop reading so as not to spoil anything. I'd also like to extend a great big Fuck You and the Horse You Rode In On to Chris O'Brien for telling me what happened, and Dave DiCamillo for telling me how it happened, after I expressly asked him not to. But more on that later.

So, it was graduation! Everyone was really freaking happy. We all know I take my tv shows a little more seriously than most people do, but I was tearing up throughout the episode. We had some classic Seth one liners, the return of the Cohens as best ever parents, great heartwarmers with all aspects of the cast. Obviously, shit was gonna go down at some point, but it really was great to see everyone so happy and so together. Because I'm a huge nerd for this show, and think of them as real people.

Everyone was going different ways, including Marissa to go work as a hand on her dad's yacht. This meant she was leaving to explore the world for a year, and said her goodbyes to everyone. The fearless foursome spent their last evening together at The Model Home -- and you know how I loves me some first season references. They swam, they joked, they walked down memory lane. *Tear. Ryan and Marissa had a lovely talk in the room of the model home where they were the first time Ryan was going to leave town, and here they were, saying goodbye again. They talked about how maybe they'd be together again someday, and how they wouldn't do anythign differently -- except maybe Oliver. *Laugh. They get in car and take off for the airport, passing a sign that reads "Leaving Orange County." It may be trite, but it's a tried and true way to get my waterworks goin, a la "Now Leaving Sunnydale. Come back soon!"

The looming darkness throughout the episode was stupid Volchek, threatening Ryan, jonesing for some Cooper forgiveness, flask-swigging while stalking Marissa & Ryan all over. Volchek, of course, runs Ryan and Marissa (who are riding in the car Ryan's mom bought him as a graduation gift) off the road, down a hill, splat. You hear the sound of Volchek's car speeding off, and after a stressful pause, see Ryan stir. I'm gonna start drinking some of that Cohen household water, because it seems to give you super car crash fatalityimmunity.

Now, referencing relationship & series mythology may not be the most artistic approach to staging a scene, but it certainly worked for me. They more than tugged at my heartstrings, they ripped those buggers down. Ryan awakens and Marissa's passed out. He, after some work, gets out of the car, realizes that it's about to explode, and gets Marissa out. The music starts. What music? That would be Imogen Heap -- who sang Hide and Seek, which punctuated last year's heart stopping finale -- singing Halleluja, which was used in the first season finale. OK, killin me already. As Ryan carries here away from the car that's catching more and more on fire, they overlay scenes from the first season of him carrying her to the poolhouse after Holly's party, and of him carrying her out of the alley in Tijuana. She dies in his arms on the side of the road, the music swells, and as he looks at her, he flashes back to the first time he left town, watching her fade into the distance as he drove away. And then I melted into a pile of salty sobs. It was beautifully done, and effing killed me. In fact, I'm tearing up again as I write this. Dammit. Marissa's character was always so very tragic, a young death is really the only fitting end. And you may remember how pissed I was at the unceremonious end to Ryan and Marissa's relationship. I should have trusted the Schwartz and known that he had a big huge Ryan and Marissa conclusion up his sleeve. So, thank you. Oh, and Seth got accepted to start in the winter at RISD, so he and Sommer will be together in Rhode Island. Anyhow, if you want to watch that last scene and judge me for being nostalgic and wimpy and crying at the mere thought of it, you can watch it on YouTube here.

UPDATE: Stream the Imogen Heap track here. (Quicktime)

New York, Here I Come

mads t r e t c h: what's the weather there going to be like this weekend?
Noboa99: i think it's overcast with a chance of emo wrist slitting

Update: It just occured to me that this is the 2nd post in just over a month where I quote an IM conversation about emo kids and cutting. Despite appearances, this isn't a recurring theme. And, I suppose, it's not all that amusing. Or at least, it wasn't before Frankie. My hardened heart and I appologize for any offense.

Angels & Airwaves

I'm torn. I'm streaming this Angels & Airwaves album on myspace and I gotta tell ya -- it aint half bad. But everytime I hear Tom DeLonge's voice, I get a little stabby. Thoughts?

UPDATE: Apparently, Central Village had a similar take on their live show.

What's One of My Favorite Things to Do?

In a streak of bordom, I recently put up one of those asinine MySpace survey things. This time, your friends are to fill it out about you. I think the question that got the funniest and most varried responses was, "What's one of my favorite things to do?"

Matt Cockerel: myspace??

Mareil Wiswell: blogggggggging... duh!

Santi Duwell: go see bands

Betsy Philpott: shower, get fountain sodas

There you have it folks. If ever I can't be found, you might want to look for me on teh internets, at the Black Cat, in the shower, or at McDonalds. If you have other suggestions for a few of my favorite things, please, let me know.

What Kind of English do you Speak?

Your Linguistic Profile::

50% General American English

30% Yankee

15% Dixie

0% Midwestern

0% Upper Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

The Blank Top Chronicles

Drew's friend Tiny (I think it's tiny... could be one of his other be-nick-named rugby friends) has been blogging about his misadventures as a dispatcher (?) for a local cab company. He shares transcripts of some of his most memorable conversations. The ludicrous requests would be funny in and of themselves, but his unfettered brazen responses are what make this blog hilarious. Here are a few of my favorite posts. Bookmark The Blank Top Chronicles and enjoy.

Pleasantly Surprised

I am currently enjoying one of the new(ish) Asian salads from McDonalds. It's surprisingly good! The ingredients taste fresh, they use yummy things like manderine oranges and edamame and almonds and different greens than just iceberg. The sesame ginger dressing is very tastey. The only thing I don't like is the red peppers, but I think they detract from most dishes. so it's no surprise there. Anyhow, if you're looking for a quick lunch option of the green variety, don't be shy -- give the new McD's salads a whirl.

Also worth your whirling is Golden Smog, a side project with members of Wilco, The Jayhawks, The Replacements, Run Westy Run and Soul Assylum. Pretty dope.

Clever Title

• Twice in less than 24 hours, I saw the same SUV. How could I tell it was the same SUV, as suburbia is littered with them, you ask? Well, this particular SUV -- parked outside Sweetwater last night, and passing me on the beltway this morning, has a huge white line art sticker of Jesus' head in the crown of thorns on the rear windsheild. I'd say the sticker takes up at least 60% of the windsheild. It's pretty intense. Kind of like this, but not exactly. I'm starting to think this SUV is my Tall African Man.
  
• Got back last night from a weekend trip to Wake Forest for Becky's graduation from law school. It was a great trip, during which I gained aproximately 83 pounds. We literally ate all weekend. From breakfasts to bbqs to receptions to cook outs to brunches to more receptions and dinners and on and on and on, the endulgence just never quit. You can see some highlights over on my flickr page. Many congratulations to Becky, and thank you for being a wonderful hostess, as always!
  
• My iPod was in a mood this morning. Everything it played was sort of suspicious/smokey/sexy. For example: "Kings of the Rodeo" by Kings of Leon, "Ryan Patrick Huseman Darrow" by De Novo Dahl, "Because" by The Beatles, "Cabin Down Below" by Tom Petty, "Call Me On Your Way Back Home" by Ryan Adams... definitely in a mood.
  
• Competition for iTunes? Good news for iTunes users.
  
• Lizzard, this news is for you.
  
• I'm late on blogging about this, but in case you missed it, Tom has done it again. Our technical guru introcued Last Call, the coolest blog project this side of DCist Maps. What's Last Call? It lets you get metro train times, movie times, concer listings, restaurant reservations and the weather by text messaging our handy dandy number. Pretty dope.
  
• Link love from the music blogger universe.
• Gavin's pissed: his halloween costume idea has been hijacked.
  

Congratulations, Graduates!

It's kind of hard for me to believe that Becky & Kevin are already graduating from law school, and that in a few short days, Joey will have his MBA. The proud mama meter is deep in the red zone. I'll be heading down to Winston-Salem in a few short hours to partake in Becky's commencement. A career upholding the law was an obvious choice for the girl imortalized in the Cav Daily with this epic saga:

My first-year hall dressed up as angels for Halloween, and we all looked very cute and angelic. As we were walking home from Sigma Nu, there was a drive-by egging. It was a car full of guys, obviously. My hallmate was hit in the leg, and it left a huge egg-shaped bruise. We felt so bad for her because we had all looked so darn cute. I mean, who would egg an angel?

-- Becky Kinlein, third-year College student

The law was a less obvious choice for Kevin "Party In My Basement" Dunlap. But who wouldn't trust their fate to this hair?

And finally, after a drunken discussion over a pack of marlboro reds with my dad, Joey decided that an MBA was in his future. Captain ADD shocked the hell out of all of us with that one, but the "my foot's in a trashcan! isn't this hilarious!" class clown of '99 sure has grown up. He's off to do businessy things in Chicago, and I couldn't be more proud.

So congratulations my friendlies!!

My Name Is A Song... Kind Of

Not to be picky, because I know I have friends who have lived their lives without a song based on their name, but the two that I've had all my life -- "Mandy" by Barry Manilow and "Amanda" by Chicago -- are pretty lame. Both good in a pinch, and enjoyable after a few beers, but neither even has a very impressive message. Mandy/Amanda is loveable! *Yawn. OK, that's not so bad, I guess, but the thing is, I just don't like either song. Not even in an ironic way. That's why I was so excited this morning, while listening to the Spinto Band album I recently acquired, to find the song "Oh Mandy." It's indie rock! It features a mandolin! Pitchfork describes it as "a ringing anthem of unrequited love!" And the chorus goes like this!:

Oh Mandy, Oh Mandy
Oh Mandy, Oh Mandy
So Dreamy, Oh Mandy
So Killing, Oh Mandy
Oh Mandy, Oh Mandy
Can read me, and has me
Oh Mandy, Oh Mandy’s
Completely out of reach

Dude! That makes me sound awesome!

Don't get any big ideas about calling me Mandy now, though. That right is reserved for a select few, who've either known me since birth, or have "Amanda Mattos is my Best Friend" tattood on their asses.

*UPDATE: After DCeiver commented, I remembered another caveat for calling me Mandy: If you make an enjoyable nick name out of it. Such as "Man Oh Mandy Mattos," as he's used before, or "Mandy Moo," as proprietarily owned by Sara Dixon. Carry on, nicknamers.

So, do you have a name song? Liz, if you say no, I'll pummel you with my fists, as you not only have one of the coolest name songs ever, but you constantly forget about it.

UPDATE: On this same album, there's a song called "So Kind, Stacy." That's a two-fer! Stace, let's seek out The Spinto Band and make friends.

Sorting Out Our Priorities

I was just reading Ad Week, and came across some stats that aren't all together shocking, but still make me scratch my head a bit. Fitness magazine recently conducted a poll about America's attitudes towards weight. 63% of women/55% of men would "rather be poor and have no weight to lose, than be rich but significantly overweight." OK, I get that one. 58% of women/54% of men would rather lose their job than gain 75 pounds. My understanding is waning. Here's the kicker: 17% of men/11% of women would consider giving up 20 points of IQ if they could have a "perfect body." Granted, those aren't high percentages, but it's still pretty dumbfounding. Pun intended. Perhaps that lot should consider what beauty without brains results in.

Old School Picture Day

Old School005.jpg
Originally uploaded by AMattos.

I stumbled across a stack of pictures this morning from various points of the awkward years, including this one from the 8th Grade Economics Fair at Thoreau. (Everyone had to partner up and sell a product. Sam and Jan, clearly, sold Phat Clay Jewelry. Katie Lee (now, Mrs. Katie Stover) and I made Human Beans -- adorable bean bag creations. Rachel Stallman and... someone made sock hats, like the one Jacob Frye is wearing in this picture. Reed and Steg both proffered carnival style games. I specifically remember turning a profit, and mine and Katie's moms taking us to The Gap after school to spend our money. Judging from the lively discussion amongst the old crew all day long, everyone remembers this fair very vividly. So as far as effective teaching tools, I'd say it was a pretty good one.

Uuuuuhm.... Little Help?

So, I think I lost a contact in my eye. I don't really know how it happened. I went to take my contacts out last night, and couldn't find my right one. So I just went to sleep. Still no dice. I can't really feel anything in my eye, though I'm psyching myself out into thinking that I can. Any pointers? Is this something that, ya know, happens? Has this happened to anyone else? Do I just wait it out, or do I go to my eye doctor? This is weird.

In a Word, a;lskdfj;pioauuwerf;lj

Warning: Blatant discussion of plot points below. Do not read if you haven't watched it yet!

The Veronica Mars season finale! Wow! Holy Cow! Zing! Pow! Pop! Boom! Bang! Awesome!!!! Catherine has a hilarious summationof our reactions while watching the show, and, ya know, thoughtful reactions to the plot after the jump. I'm surprised the cops haven't come a'callin' yet, seeing as how the my reaction to Logan kissing Veronica was in the form of a high-volume, neighbor-waking, super squeally girl scream. And the framing on that couch shot was excellent. And I liked the reference to last season's finale with her waking up after the fall out to Logan's surprising presence. And, Haaron's sex noises are revolting, and the hilarious size of his ego would have been enough to make his head explode if CW hadn't entered the scene. Aaaaand poor Mack! And poor Weevil!! I mean, I know he set Thumper up to die and all, but, come on -- let the guy graduate!! And, also -- can you charge someone with murder if you don't have a body or evidence of a crime? A missing person isn't enough to charge someone with murder, is it? And dammit, they gave Duncan a location, which means he'll be in the story line next year. Dammit! Anyhow, I need to go... that finale took a lot out of me!

Scientific Proof: Sexuality Is Genetic

Slate Human Nature column, you've englightened me yet again:

Lesbian brains differ from straight women's brains. Last year, a study showed that gay men, like straight women and unlike straight men, processed a male pheromone in a sex-related part of the brain (the hypothalamus) but processed a female pheromone in a scent-related part of the brain. Now the authors of that study report differences among women: 1) Lesbians, like straight men, prefer the female pheromone and find it less irritating than the male pheromone. 2) Straight women find the female pheromone more irritating. 3) Straight men and women process same-sex pheromones in the scent area but process opposite-sex pheromones in the hypothalamus. 4) Lesbians process pheromones of both sexes in the scent area. Interpretations: 1) Sexual orientation is biologically based, not a choice. 2) Sexual orientation is more biologically based in men than in women. (For a summary of the study of gay men, click here. For Human Nature's take on gay marriage, click here.)

Seriously

Tyler Cash, you are nuts. I am sitting in your house, where we were meeting, exactly now. But instead of waiting for me, you went to Target. If you had more posessions in here, I'd turn your room upside down right now, but, you have like 3 things total. I'm going to go read my book now.

My Weekend: A Photo Essay

"You Mean Naked Kissing?"

Can we PLEASE stop ending episodes with Veronica in tears? You're breakin my heart here! Catherine and I are, of course, mid-post ep breakdown, and she'll have organized thoughts on Zunta shortly, but... so sad.

Friendly Neighborhood Links

I haven't do one a link round up since before macrock, so forgive me if these are like, so totally over.

• The prices at J.Crew have been absurd for a while now, but it's really just gotten entirely ridiculous. Call me crazy, but I'm pretty sure I saw this at H&M last week for about $12.99.
  
• Free trees! Get your free trees here!
  
• Joey Kull: Your moment has arrived
• Beer is bad for your lungs, wine's not.
  
• The ultimate compendium of bitchy blog commentors. (Thanks Kathryn)
• As if it wasn't cool enough already to be a professional world famous magician.
  
• Embrace napping!
• Very interesting article about the disappearance of the generation gap, and the prevailing culture of cool. Not the most well organized theory, but still some interesting stuff. I can certainly sympathize with the part about wanting to work for passion and happiness more than material gains.
  
• Jamie brings you: Self cooling beer!
  
• I heart lists: 50 Worst Things To Happen To Music
• I still heart lists: World's Greatest Cover Songs
  
• Saved the cutest for last. I dare you not to die of cute overdose.
  

Extremely Groggy Thoughts Immediately After Waking From A Nap

• Did anyone out there see Jeopardy tonight? Nathan = strangest. contestant. ever.
  
• Dude! Keith, Veronica -- I found Leiann. She's living in some suburbs, married to another balding man that's not half as cute as Keith. And her other children, who are quite young, bought her diamonds for mother's day. I hope that helps you track down Veronica's college money.
  
• WHOA! Old dude on Prison Break just knocked the shit out of the boss dude! Double whoa! A big piece of glass shanked the shit out of him!
  
• YCJCYADFTJB
• I really need to vaccuum.
  
• Hey, congratulations Joey!
  
• Poseidon does not look like a good movie.
  
• Band of Horses are really tight.
  
• My hair smells like shampoo. My cat's breath smells like cat food.
  
• Did they model the DVD ads for Munich after the current ads for Flight 93 to cash in on some of their current cultural currency?
  
• OHSHIT! Old dude on Prison Break is a friggin bad ass!
  
• And Scofield... sweet, sweet Scofield. I'd like to go on some dating show where my potential suitors are Wentworth Miller, Michael Showalter, Justin Chambers, Jake Gyllenhaal, George Clooney and Raoul Bova. Yeah, that'd be really fun.
  

Hilarious

Google image search Amanda Mattos. The first result is hilarious (for those of us that know him, and his turtle).

Oh, America, you never cease to stun me

So, I'm not really a supporter of the Flight 93 movie. I tend to share Ryan's sentiments that he posted on DCist last week. But regardless, I'd expect the American masses to throw their weight behind it. Nay! Instead, the mental giants across this great land made RV, a movie that looks so stupid and unenjoyable that the commercials actually hurt my feelings, number one at the box office this weekend. You know what this means, right? The terrorists won.

What's hotter than George Clooney & Barack Obama?

Gavin Duncan of course! Happy (belated) birthday to the one and only Gavin. Our friendship was born out of a genius idea to switch shirts at a DTD party (seriously -- why did we decide to do that? I can't seem to recall, but you looked stunning in my pink, flowered Gap baby tee), and has lasted through years of hilarious phone calls and picture messages. Looking forward to seeing you when I'm up in NY in a few weeks. Much love to the Gavin!

See, this is why Gavin's so indispensible:

Noboa99: yeah i'm no longer intimidated by women that are smarter than me
Noboa99: mainly because i know that deep down i'll always be a better driver no matter what that fucking maryland cop says about BAC